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Feb 09

Valentine Oreo Bark

Because I can eat Oreo Bark all year long, I decided to make a Valentine version. Doesn’t that make you happy??

Valentine Oreo Bark

As Jordan gets older it’s getting harder to shield her from inappropriate things on TV and radio. Actually, it’s not getting harder so much as she’s getting smarter and she listens to and sees everything.

When she was 3 we could rock out to “I’m Sexy and I Know It” and she just thought the beat was fun. Now an Ariana Grande song comes on the radio and she starts singing along and I really listen and I cringe.

When she was 4 we’d watch the red carpet shows and she’d ooh and ahhh and point out the pretty dresses. Now, thanks to the stylists of people like Jennifer Lopez and Jennifer Anniston the term “plunging neckline” has a new meaning and I have to field questions like “MOM! HER BOOBS ARE SHOWING!” and then I have to change the channel and watch Liv & Maddie again.

There are some parents out there who shield their kids from everything. They only watch Disney Jr. and shows with theme songs that make you want to murder someone. They only listen to kid CDs or classical music in the car.

I’m not that person. I never have been, and I never will be. I want to listen to pop music in the car and by gosh, I’m going too. We’re going to watch Amazing Race and Shark Tank as a family, and every once in awhile I’ll have to mute the boy commercial and I’m okay with that.

But something I’d never thought I’d have to police? Conversation Hearts. Have you read some of them lately?

Conversation Hearts for Valentine's Day Bark

While I was making this bark I was going through and reading some of the sayings. The normal, cute ones were there:

XOXO

YOU ROCK

FIRST KISS

SOUL MATE

I {HEART} YOU

And then I found these:

TOO HOT.

I’M SURE.

And best one?

DON’T TELL.

I checked the bag of seemingly innocent conversation hearts I got at Walmart and there was no XXX rating on the package.

Seriously? DON’T TELL? TOO HOT? I’m sorry, but WTH? KIDS eat these things. Young kids. Preschoolers and Kindergarteners. 4th graders who are starting to become aware of boys and bodies. It’s just…wrong.

Okay, I’ll get off my soapbox now. Let’s talk Valentine’s Day Oreo Bark.

Oreos for Oreo Bark

It’s full of Oreos, obviously.

If you remember, a few years ago, I posted this Peppermint Oreo Bark recipe. It was Jordan’s brainchild: layers of milk chocolate, chopped Oreos, white chocolate, and crushed candy canes. She considers it her invention and she makes it several times every holiday. She can even make it herself without any help from me.

She wanted a Valentine version, so I gave it to her. But I tried to weed out the less than PG conversation hearts. (Obviously I missed a few.)

Valentine Oreo Bark is the perfect treat to give on Valentine's Day! Layers of white and milk chocolate sandwich Oreo cookies and conversation hearts.

This bark has 4 ingredients (5 if you add sprinkles) and is ready in less than 30 minutes. Also? If you’re not careful it can disappear in less than that amount of time too. Ahem.

A few notes about the recipe:

  • I used Candiquik (almond bark, candy melts, etc.) when making this bark. I’ve also use chocolate and white chocolate chips in the past. You can use either one, but I decided to go the almond bark route because I’ve had the hardest time lately melting chocolate chips. I do it all the time but the last several batches I’ve done for different recipes have given me trouble, especially white chocolate. I didn’t want to have to throw anything away, so I went the sure thing route.
  • If you use chocolate and/or white chocolate chips instead of the melting candy, be sure to add 1-2 teaspoons of vegetable oil or Crisco in the bowl when you’re melting. Also, make sure and melt the chocolate at 50% power in increments of 30 seconds, stirring well between each. If you have trouble, try a different kind of bowl. I find that, for my microwave, clear glass bowls or those ziploc reusable sealable containers work best.
  • You can use any kind of Oreo you want. Regular, double stuff, Golden…use your favorite.
  • You can skip the conversation hearts and just do sprinkles, if you want. Anything heart and pink and red will SCREAM Valentine’s Day.
  • Get this out of your house STAT or you’ll eat it all.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you!

Valentine Oreo Bark

DON’T TELL but I’m CRAZY 4 U. 🙂

Valentine Oreo Bark

Prep Time:5 minutes

Cook Time:5 minutes

Total Time:10 minutes + chilling

Oreos, chocolate, and conversation hearts. This bark will be a hit this Valentine's Day!


Ingredients:


  • 10 Oreos, coarsely chopped

  • 8 ounces chocolate Candiquik, candy melts, or chocolate chips (see note)

  • 8 ounces vanilla Candiquik, candy melts, or white chocolate chips (see note)

  • 1/2 cup conversation heart candies

  • Valentine Sprinkles, optional


Directions:


  1. Line a cookie sheet with wax paper.

  2. Add chocolate candy to a microwave safe bowl and heat in 30 second increments, stirring after each, until melted and smooth. Pour onto prepared cookie sheet and spread flat, into an approximately 7x10 rectangle. Sprinkle with chopped Oreos. Chill for 10 minutes.

  3. Add white chocolate to a microwave safe bowl and heat on 50% power in 30 second increments, stirring after each, until melted and smooth. (I use 50% power for white chocolate because it’s so temperamental!) Pour over Oreos and spread to the edges of the milk chocolate. Sprinkle with chopped conversation hearts and sprinkles. Chill until set, break into pieces and serve or package to give!


I have been having lots of trouble melted chocolate chips lately. Maybe it’s the weather, maybe it’s my microwave, maybe it’s bad chocolate, but who knows! I used Candiquik to be on the safe side. You can also use almond bark or candy melts. They’re all sold either in the baking aisle of the grocery store or at craft stores. You can also use chocolate chips (1 cup of each kind). If using chocolate chips add 1-2 teaspoons of vegetable oil or Crisco when melting to avoid overheating.


Adapted from this peppermint version, recipe by my daughter Jordan.


Valentine’s Fudge

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Teacher Valentine Printable

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Candy Buttons

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Sweets from friends:
Valentine’s Bark by Lil’ Luna
Valentine Conversation Heart Bark by Bake at 350
Valentine’s Day Chocolate Bark by Crunchy Creamy Sweet