When I was a kid, Santa came on Christmas. I put out cookies and milk that were gone in the morning. I was happy with that.
My daughter? Has an elf that requires daily movement. God forbid I forget to move France from place to place and have to either (a) try to distract my child into getting dressed so that I can almost kill myself running down the stairs to throw him to a new spot before she sees me or (b) make up some sort of elaborate story as to why he didn’t move the night before, all while taking into account all the stories I’ve made up previously, lest there be a conflict.
On Easter when I was a kid, there was a short-lived 6am egg hunt culminating in a basket of goodies I always looked forward too.
Somehow, a few years ago, the Easter Bunny (stupidly) started the tradition of a treasure hunt to find the Easter basket, instead of a regular old egg hunt, which takes place immediately upon waking up, usually around 6am.
Guess what I get to do at 9pm on Easter Eve?
Then there is the tooth fairy. When I was a kid I left my tooth in a little envelope taped to my headboard and would wake to a quarter in its place.
When Jordan lost her first tooth, our tooth fairy left glitter all over the floor. GLITTER. And a note. And money. In fact, Jordan routinely asks what I think her tooth fairy is going to bring her whenever she loses a tooth. Apparently, forking over $5 for a disgusting little piece of DNA is not enough. Lots of her friends get gifts: movies, ornaments at Christmas, and other trinkets. So now I need to borrow money from her allowance to stuff under her pillow and buy her a gift.
And now we have leprechauns to deal with. We have to make traps, mess up the house, dye the toilet water green, leave footprints, and prepare green milk for cereal.
Unless we forget.
And then have to deal with the tears while we covertly remove the green food coloring from the baking cabinet and sneak it upstairs to the bathroom, where the bathroom glass can be filled with green water.
And then we can listen as our poor, neglected child recounts stories from her friends about what their leprechaun did to their house. Because ours forgot she existed. Obviously.
At least I make her lots of treats to keep her happy.
Back in January, she posted Red Velvet Cake Batter Dip. Which was funny, because I was planning to make this dip the next week. So instead of trying to come up with a recipe as I went along, I decided to just use hers. Why mess with perfection?
Last week she made Blondie Batter Dip. In that post she mentioned needing to find new things to dip in all her dips. Well, Ashton, this is for you.
I made pie crust dippers for this Devil’s Food version of the cake batter dip. I just cut out scalloped rounds of (refrigerated) pie crust, brushed them with melted butter, and sprinkled them with sugar before baking.
Then I dipped away.
And it was awesome.